- Keep track of the moments of rejection.
The rejection comes from the need to be good, the need to like others. To keep track of the state of rejection, you are in full awareness almost all the time.
Ask yourself questions all the time: “Is that what I want to do now?” “Would that be good for me?”
- Re-examine your beliefs
One of the signs of self-loathing is self-criticism. When you criticize yourself, you kind of report that you are not in the right place, do not meet someone’s expectations.
First, figure out whose expectations, demands these are. Where they come from and why you have to meet them.
To your astonishment, you will suddenly find out that some of the requirements are random statements of some acquaintances or completely strangers.
Your brain has taken them out of the context of the conversation. And that may have been relevant to you at all. But for some reason, you remember it. And you started to stick to that criterion.
When you want to be good to your loved ones, it’s understandable, but the need to be liked by absolutely everyone leads to the loss of yourself.
Do a thorough review of your (your?) beliefs, criteria of a good person, wife/husband, mother/father, daughter/son, employee, friend, etc.
Some of these will fall away after you are conscious. Others will have to work with.
- Keep a diary of acceptance.
If you’re having trouble accepting yourself in its entirety, accept yourself in pieces. Start with your personality traits, habits, looks.
Keep a diary of acceptances, describing cases where you didn’t accept yourself and when it happened. Keep track of changes and reward yourself.
Don’t expect that if you haven’t accepted yourself at all, once you start working on yourself, you can accept yourself as a whole. It starts with the little things.
Collect these particles, mark the slightest change in yourself, write down and reread in moments of decline, self-judgment.
- The “Who Am I?” practice.
To learn to accept yourself, do the practice.
Answer your questions:
Who am I? Am I my body? No. Am I a surname, a name? No, you’re not.
Do it in a meditative state.
Answering these questions in sequence will get you to your point. And you’ll understand that you’re not this body, you’re not Ivan Petrov or the manager of this company.
You are not just a person, but something more.
You’re nothing and everything at once. You are the spirit, part of the universe, part of the creator. You are the Universe and you are the Creator.
If you learn to track states of non-acceptance, at such moments you will remember who you are the true. And then it will be immediately clear that you do not accept your ego, not yourselves.
You will understand that the body is just an instrument, and your name, profession, belonging to a certain family, country – are elements of personality. This is the role that you have chosen to play.
This practice will help you accept yourself. More precisely, not yourself, but this role. Because you can’t help but accept your true self.
- Take the example of small children
Look how much the kids love themselves, enjoy their little achievements.
When a child is just learning to walk, they don’t judge themselves for falling. He accepts himself at that moment. It’s love for yourself and total acceptance in its purest form.
Yes, children need a mother’s love. They need it for growth and development. If she is missing, it’s like taking away the sun for a long time. It’s kind of like living is possible, but it slows down development.
The younger the child, the more he accepts and loves himself. Little children have not yet lost the feeling of unconditional love for themselves and everything that surrounds them.
And all because they live in a moment of “here and now.” They don’t live in the past or in the future. They’re absorbed in the present moment.
- The practice of “Rebirth of unconditional love for yourself.”
Accepting yourself will help to work with an inner child. The only difference is that we usually find our wounded aspects and heal as adults.
And here, on the contrary, a small child heals all subsequent injuries up to our present version.
Enter a meditative state. Think of yourself as a little one. Scroll the tape of your life back to childhood until you remember yourself as a child when you accepted yourself completely.
If you don’t remember it anymore, it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
Imagine how you would feel about yourself, how you would love yourself if you were a little boy who doesn’t know what it means to be rejected yet.
Track those feelings and remember them. Carry them over to yourself today. Fill yourself with these feelings. Send rays of love and acceptance to those aspects of you that need it.
If you want, remember those moments of self-judgment.
Or better yet, simply send the intention that you are healing all your aspects with that innocent childlike pure unconditional love. And haul this condition into the crystal of the Earth.
Acceptance is the first step towards discovering the source of love in yourself.
It is the beginning of positive change, self-healing, cognition of oneself and the acquisition of integrity.
By accepting, you learn tolerance for your loved ones, you gain wisdom.